I happen to have two daughters in middle school. I think their word count is closer to 40,000 a day each. When I pick them up in the afternoons, it seems that they each race to see who can hit their limit first as they share everything that went on that day and how they feel about it.

I’ll be completely honest, silence works for me. I like efficient conversations that have a defined result and conclusion. Left to my selfish instinct, I would get very annoyed and impatient with the conversations with my girls each day.

I have to make a choice, let their words wear me out and make me irritable or genuinely show interest in what they say and engage with them in the conversation. One is natural, one is not. One is comfortable, one is not. But, if I go with natural and comfortable I am missing something. That something is extremely important. When I blow them off and tune them out, I am missing a connection with my daughters that is priceless.

By engaging with them, I am building them up and strengthening our relationship in the everyday moments so that when the extreme and extraordinary moments come, we can walk them together. Because I love my daughters and want the absolute best for their lives, I must be willing to do my part to equip them and build them up for the future. My role in their lives is vital to their future emotional and spiritual health. I am responsible for what I do in regards to that.

So, I deal with the 14,000 word difference 3 ways (which equals a 42,000 word difference) each day with my wife and daughters because its matters and because it is what is right.

I am a pastor and I hold other titles and positions, but all of them fade away in comparison to my responsibility as husband and father. My family is my first ministry.

Ladies, recognize that the men in your life generally just aren’t going to verbalize as much as you do. Men recognize that the women in your life are going to verbalize a lot more than you, but you still need to engage with them intentionally and recognize the importance of those times. As we do, our relationships will grow and strengthen bringing meaning and fulfillment.

Me on the 18th fairway at TPC Sawgrass

I play golf.

I should probably say that golf plays me.

One of the things I have learned is that when you lose focus, you lose everything on the course. It takes a tremendous amount of energy to remain mentally focused all the way through a swing. It sounds so easy, but can be so hard to do. That is one of the things that sets the pros apart. They have trained themselves to be able to focus through every shot and keep that focus through the entire round. You can always spot when that focus is fading. The shots get more erratic, the golfer gets frustrated, and the score suffers.

Another thing I have learned is the importance of resilience. Bad shots will happen (for some of us they happen a lot). When they do, it is important to adjust, get over it, and reset for the next shot. Amateurs and hackers struggle with this greatly. Some pros do too. The pros who do, either don’t last long on tour, or aren’t well known. That bounce back ability is so key for a golfer. This past weekend 17 year old Beau Hossler made headlines and captured the attention of a lot of people. This is a quality he exhibited greatly on Saturday. He would make a bogey and the next hole he would birdie. He did this multiple times. He bounced back well.

Whatever we are doing in life will take focus and resilience in order to be successful. We have to focus on the task at hand and stay with it all the way through to the end. It’s not easy. It takes effort and energy. It also sets those apart who do. And, we have to learn how to bounce back quickly. Setbacks will happen. We will have adverse moments. We won’t always “get the bounce”. How we recover is vital. In fact, it might be the setback itself that sets us up for success, but only if we have the resilience to bounce back and and take the next shot.

Me on the 18th fairway at TPC Sawgrass

By Steve Mitchell, US Presswire

Last night as I was watching game 5 of the NBA Eastern Conference Finals something stuck out to me. Much has been made of the Miami Heat and the Big 3 and everyone has weighed in on why or why not it is a good idea. I am not a sportswriter, nor is this a sports blog, however, the thought I had crosses from sports to other areas as well.

As I watched the teams battle it out on the court there was a noticeable difference in the way the two teams played. The Celtics were playing to with an “all out” mentality to earn a championship. It comes across that the Heat are playing with the expectation that they are entitled to win and everyone is supposed to accept it. That is what I see as the reason the Heat lost last night and will likely lose the series.

A sense of entitlement is never a good thing. Whenever we feel we deserve something or are owed, we usually don’t show any gratitude and rarely put our “all” into whatever it is.

At a restaurant where we expect to be served and have what we want when we want, we tend to behave in a way that we wouldn’t in other places. We are more demanding, less tolerant, and, unfortunately, often less polite. In this situation, one usually doesn’t walk away with an immense sense of gratitude for the waiter/waitress that just served them. This is because we feel entitled to that service because we are paying for it.

That sense of entitlement is what turn a person into a jerk. It is what causes them to loose focus on others around them. It is, at its core, selfishness. It is inward looking, thinking, focused.

There is much of this in society today. We feel very entitled as Americans to so many things.

Too often, we transfer this over to the church as well. We begin to believe that we are entitled to certain things when we attend church. It becomes a club where we are a member to be served rather than to serve. We even begin to feel that God owes us something. This is one reason why so many struggle with the reality of God and/or walk away when life hits a bumpy stretch. When a person feels entitled to the blessings of God, they get very disillusioned quickly when they don’t get what they want, when they want it and then blame God.

The Celtics don’t seem to have the same sense of entitlement as the Heat as a team. They seem to be trying to earn it; to do whatever it takes to win.

With God, we are neither entitled nor can we earn anything. In fact, we deserve punishment and death for our selfishness & pride against a holy God. Instead, God in His grace and mercy offers us His blessing and purpose and life.

The right attitude is gratitude. We are not entitled, God does not owe any of us anything. We can’t earn anything from Him, we are not good enough or strong enough to do so. We can, however, live a life fully devoted to Him and His purposes by serving others and giving our all out of gratitude for what He has already done.

• This past Sunday ROCKED! Elena brought a great word and did a fantastic job as she preached our Mother’s Day sermon. It’s a cliche I know, but I truly married out of my league!
• This past Sunday ROCKED AGAIN! Two people stepped forward to commit their lives to Christ!!! That is our purpose! That is one of our two reasons for existence: 1)reaching those far from Christ and 2)equipping believers to live out their purpose.
• This Sunday is WATER BAPTISM. I love water baptism. It is the outward sign of obedience to the work that God has done in our lives. You can find out more about water baptism here.
• Last night was INSPIRING! We hosted Bob Wieland last night. Bob lost both legs in Vietnam and has spent the past 42 years sharing his story of hope and life. It’s always too early to quit!
• This Sunday is going to be INCREDIBLE! If you need healing, encouragement, challenged, or just want to connect with God then you MUST be at CapCity! Our guest that day is missionary Don Triplett. Don is from El Salvador and they regularly see miracles happen in their services. You will be inspired.
• BIKER SUNDAY is coming up! I love this day! It is Father’s Day, June 17. Whether you ride a Harley, Honda, BMW, or even a Vespa bring it out and be a part of this great event. Even if you don’t ride, come check out the bikes. More than that we will have a powerful testimony from a biker that has experienced the lifechange that only comes from an encounter with Jesus. Plus, just for fun, we will have a free t-shirt for the first 100 bikers in the door, lunch on site for everyone, and a bike blessing before the riders head out for an afternoon ride. More info including a downloadable flyer can be found here.
• There are other stories of LIFECHANGE and God moving on hearts that are incredible and we will be sharing those stories over the next couple of months!

I said it a few months ago to end a sermon: Wait ’till you see what God does next!

That now infamous press conference with coach Jim Mora is forever etched in our brains thanks to a couple of different beer commercials.

It is no secret that I am a big fan of football. The NFL has always been my favorite form of football to watch. From the first time I saw Joe Montana play, I have been an avid 49ers fan. I don’t remember the exact game or even what year it was, probably 1980. I think I was seven. Watching that master of the game direct the offense and thread the defenses with those tight spirals had me hooked. I’ve been watching pro football ever since.

This time of year is bitter sweet for me. The playoffs are exciting and a lot of fun, but it also means that in a few weeks, football will be finished for several months.

This year is, of course, very exciting! With the 49ers finally back in the hunt as legitimate contenders, this playoff season has been a blast. I am greatly looking forward to the game on Sunday against the Giants.

My wife got me a fantastic present for Christmas this year, a throwback Joe Montana jersey. Sweet!

Anyway, my prediction for the games this weekend:

AFC

• Ravens 20
• Patriots 31

NFC

• Giants 17
• 49ers 26

As much as I think a Ravens vs. 49ers Superbowl would be and see the Harbaugh brothers coaching against each other again, I don’t think it will happen.

We are holding a Super Bowl party at the church on February 5 at the church. However, Indianapolis is only a couple of hours away, so if someone would like to give me tickets to the big game…..

My Joe Montana jersey I got for Christmas!

• Each Tuesday I will post a Bible study. This will most often be in the form of a video post with some text support. We will start next week at 1 John 1. We will walk through the books of 1,2,&3 John.
• Thursdays will be a random day where I post about life, sports, technology, whatever. This is also where I will post book reviews.
• Fridays I will post regarding Capital City Church. This will include upcoming series, a preview of the upcoming Sunday, things that are happening and other thoughts regarding this great congregation.
• The weekends will be sporadic as I post from time to time about things currently happening.

The goal of this new focus is to blog more regularly and provide more content.

Very soon, I will start blogging excerpts to a book I hope to have finished by the end of the year. When this starts, I will post these on Saturdays.

I look forward to the journey together in 2012.

Also today, my wife and daughters went to an estate sale. Elena called me asking about a couple of items there to see if they were good deals. She didn’t buy those, but bought plenty other items. The books in the picture to the right were among her “treasure finds”. They are very cool and will make great accent pieces wherever she decides to use them. She made a statement about how she couldn’t believe no one in the family wanted them. Simply, they had no value to the family over whatever amount of money could be obtained in the estate sale. They do have enough value to my wife to pay what she for them.

The world of collectible, antiques, Craig’s list, eBay, etc is fickle and funny. At the end of the day, items only have the amount of value that someone is actually willing to pay, no matter what an “expert” or anyone else says.

Those who have been in church very long have heard that God loves us so much He sent His Son to die on a cross for us. We have extreme value to Him. He created us, then He bought us. The problem is that this can become cliché to us. The truth and the reality within this get lost in our familiarity with it. We can easily lose our sense of value in what Jesus did for us. We can also lose sight of how valuable we are to Him: more than anything else in creation.

You have great value.

See www.ralphwaldoemerson.me

However, if we are constantly looking for the week to end and can’t wait for a day or days to be over, then we are missing out on what could be right now. Too many people spend too much time regretting the past and fretting about the future. We need to learn from the past, yes. We also need to plan for what will be. We MUST live in the now. If we don’t, great opportunities and significant moments will be missed.

It’s Wednesday, the week is half over. That means we only have a couple of days left to make this week matter. To walk through the doors of possibility. To significantly impact others now. I read a tweet this morning from a college student who recently lost someone, “Still shocked how people can be gone so quickly”. The weekend may hold an exciting event we are looking forward to or it may just be a chance to sleep in, but today is here now and it is full of great possibilities. What will we do?