I’m going to share a little bit of what is happening in me right now. Just decided to offer some transparency here as well as continue processing through some of this. By the way, it’s all good. Well, it’s moving towards good, at least. Some of it is difficult and even painful as I confront things in me and change and refocus and learn and grow.
Too often I think we see growth as this fun and exciting thing with great benefits and wonderful outcomes. While those elements are involved in stages of growth, more often than not there is also pain and conflict and upheaval involved in growth. Like a plant pushing through the soil, personal growth means things get pushed back, pushed out, displaced, moved, changed, choked out, taken over, and on it goes.
That said, here are some issues, ideas, concepts, etc. that are in upheaval in my life.
I have been rethinking ministry for some time. Let me clarify to try and head off confusion. I have been rethinking ministry roles and definitions for some time, not God’s call. I am very sure of God’s calling, just working through the details of some aspects of that calling. As life and ministry move forward, my role is changing and the way that I go about things needs to change. My girls are growing up faster than I want them to, health issues are a factor now, and the list continues. Capital City is unlike any place or position I have been in before and so the way I approach it must be different as well. All of this factors in.
Beyond all of it, God is speaking. He is pruning, He is working and molding. He is doing what He does. It’s awesome, but it isn’t easy. It isn’t always fun. In fact, it is hard work. It is demanding. It requires much. Because of this I am going through a change in my routines and my approach to things. All of this is still very much a work in progress and I am more convinced than ever it always will be.
One specific area that I am being challenged in is health. A few years ago, I lost a substantial amount of weight, though I never reached my final goal. I have a gained a portion of that back. And I am not in the physical condition I should be. How I remedy that is one of the things I am working through. A regular exercise regimen will be a part of it though. This is not a diet, it is a mindset I am changing.
Another area is time management. I have become lax in this area and even allowed some laziness to set in. That is painful to face and admit, but it is there. I waste time that I should redeem. I’m not talking about working crazy hours and not relaxing; been there bought the t-shirt and almost lost more than it was worth. Anyway, I am speaking of making better use of time. Working smarter and more effectively. Being intentional with my schedule at the office and at home.
The way I lead is also undergoing a shift. I am spending more time in planning and working out systems and structure and vision. I am trying to do less and empower others more. Ironic thing is that makes my schedule busier. The standard is being raised and the expectations are greater for me and the team around me.
I am also journaling and reading a lot more right now. Prayer is a bigger and more significant part of my life and time. Bible study is taking on a different light as it has become even deeper. Things are becoming more focused and more simple.
Yes, I said simple. Really this isn’t complicated and neither is life. We make things complicated. Sin complicates things. Lazy and apathy muddy the waters. God and His Word brings things into focus and makes them clear. He simplifies everything down to faith, hope, and love.
The funny thing is, simple isn’t always easy.
Would love to hear some of what God is speaking and challenging in you…